The End Has Come
by HardlyFatal
Summary: The end has come; the end has gone. But is any story truly finished? Much can happen in the span of ten years. People change. And in a small area of Japan, centuries ago, we learn a fraction of the fate of our familiar heroes. COMPLETE


**Author's Note:** this is a very bizarre satire mocking the worst of the clichées to be found in the Inuyasha fandom. Much abuse of fangirl Japanese, and every sacred cow you can think of has been made into hamburgers. Glossary at the end.

**The End Has Come  
by CinnamonGrrl**

**Part the First**

If Kagome had known that Sesshoumaru would be just as remote and distant after their marriage as before it, well, there wouldn't have been a marriage in the first place. And being the Lord of the West didn't pay as well as she'd been led to believe, either. The monthly bills for his sword-polishing compound were beggaring them, and Kagome's steadily-growing fondness for sake wasn't helping their financial issues, either.

More and more, she'd found herself turning to Shippou— now a handsome, well-built seventeen-year-old— for companionship and understanding. And if things had gotten out of hand last night, well, that had been the sake. She was positive he'd enjoyed his first time being with an experienced older woman, in any case.

The sake was responsible for more and more, of late. Kagome really hadn't meant to hit Rin quite that hard with the takebouki, but she just couldn't take the way the girl and that toad kept making cow-eyes at each other. But now, with the note in her hand explaining that Rin and Jaken had eloped, Kagome found herself at a loss for how to explain it all to Sesshoumaru.

Perhaps more sake would help.

She tossed back another choko of it— not even bothering to heat it; the point was inebriation, not relishing the experience— and made her way to Sesshoumaru's study, weaving back and forth unsteadily. Shoving open the shoji screen, Kagome was confronted with the oh-so-familiar scene of him sitting at his benkyouzukue, his sole hand steadily moving a cloth rhythmically over the already-gleaming surface of Toukijin.

He did not look up at her noisy entrance, his amber eyes fixed on his task, so she waved the note airily in front of his face. "Jaken n' Rin've eloped," she slurred, tripping over the hem of her yukata and tumbling to the furoaa. "Whupsfellover."

No reaction. Kagome sighed and hauled herself upright. "Don't come whining t'me if she's had a thousand tadpoles by this time next year," she warned. "I'll hit 'em all with the takebouki."

No reaction, just the steady movement of fabric on steel.

"Whatever," Kagome muttered, and lurched back to the sake. Er, the chouriba. Where the sake lived. Slumping into her chea once more, she drained another chockoful and set it back on the chouridai with an exaggerated flourish, then eyed the takebouki in the corner. "Everyone gets the takebouki!" she announced to no one, shaking her genko. "Even Shippou!"

Thinking back to the previous night, Kagome smiled. Judging from certain of his reactions, the kitsune might even enjoy it.

* * *

**Part the Second**

Jakotsu had never thought that his heart would mend from Inuyasha's cold-hearted rejection. And when he thought of who the hanyou _had_ fallen in love with, who held his affections now… well, Jakotsu had been convinced that his unlife would be a lonely and dejected one.

The raketto came down on the back of his thighs again. Thankful for the straps holding him upright, he sagged against the leather restraint and rode the wave of pain to the end, the gritting of his teeth morphing into a smile at his beloved.

"I never… would have… suspected you'd be… so good at this, koishii," he panted. "I didn't think you'd have it in you."

Sango tapped the raketto against her palm a moment, surveying the bright pink marks on her lover's body, before laying it down and selecting his favourite instrument of discipline, the extra-whippy hoippu. She strolled casually around him in a circle, dragging the flap at the hoippu's end over his bruised skin.

"Of course I do," she replied smoothly. "It was Miroku who didn't have it in him; that's why I chose you instead." Her hand lashed out unexpectedly, laying a stripe of red across his katahada. "But he's happier where he is, now."

She leaned closer, kissing him tenderly before whapping him smartly across the denbu. "And so are you."

Jakotsu's eyes lit up, then closed slowly in delirious pleasure. "Yes, mistress."

* * *

**Part the Third**

Kagura lounged back in the onsen and surveyed her surroundings with contentment. When she'd first gotten the idea for taking not only the houshi but the ookami prince to be her lovers, they'd hadn't liked each other at all.

First, there was the jealousy: neither liked sharing her with the other. Once she'd disabused them of the notion that either of them were in control— that it was she, not they, calling the shots— they'd settled into a grudging acceptance of each other's presence in her life.

After a few years, she'd insisted they share her futon at the same time. _Oh, that hadn't gone over well at all,_ she recalled. Both had been horrified at the idea of performing in front of another male. But with patience, skill, and not a little sake, she'd managed to break them of that inhibition until they were trading her off like brothers.

And now… Kagura watched, a namida of joy coming to her ake eyes, as the two slowly, gently, tenderly rogered each other positively stupid. On the shore of the ideyu, the hot water lapped rhythmically at them as their bodies strove toward completion.

She stood and made her way toward them, intent on joining in the fun. And if they objected? Well, there were always those jaa in her locked closet, back at the house…

* * *

**Part the Fourth **

Inuyasha blushed. As Inuyasha blushed once about every six minutes, this was nothing new and therefore his dantsuku, Suikotsu, took no action beside privately thinking how kawaii his koibitu was.

But this time, Inuyasha kept blushing, until Suikotsu began to wonder if there were a problem with his koishii's blood pressure. "Are you well, Inuyasha?" Waddling over to where the hanyou stood in the ainoto of their modest home, he continued with a charming smile, "I thought I was the one who had to watch out for preeclampsia."

Inuyasha went pale. "There's nothing wrong with our pups, is there?" he demanded, dropping to his morohiza and pressing his face against his husband's midsection.

"No, no, koi, nothing like that," Suikotsu assured him. "I was wondering if something were wrong with _you_." His smile faltered a moment. "You haven't changed your mind about pupping, have you? I know it's been hard, not being able to make love until after I've pupped, but it won't be long, now…"

"No!" Inuyasha hastened to correct him. "It's not that! Just the opposite!" He blushed again, colour scalding his cheeks. "D'you remember the last time we… before you got too big?"

Suikotsu smiled at the memory. "How could I forget?" He leered playfully at his koishii. "You were so yielding, so accepting…"

Inuyasha blushed harder, his face passing 'crimson' and fast coming up on 'vermilion'. "You have no idea," he said. "I'm pregnant, too."

Suikotsu was amazed for just a moment before wrapping his arms around the smaller, slender form. "Oh, Inuyasha, that's wonderful. We'll have such a wonderful, full house… with so much life and love…" He pressed a passionate kisu to his dantsuku's lips.

"But we'll have to get a lock for our bedroom amido, or none of the pups will let us have any peace," Inuyasha joked, then reddened further at his daring.

Suikotsu just smiled wider. How wonderful was his shy, kawaii chibi hanyou dantsuku! "I'm so lucky you chose me," he declared passionately, embracing his love. "Why _did _you? Why me? Why not Kagome?"

Inuyasha's eyes darkened with disappointment and remembered itami. "Let's just say, that Kagome was no Kikyou," he muttered, averting his gaze.

Suikotsu's face softened in comprehension. He tilted up Inuyasha's downcast visage with a gentle finger. "Aishiteru, koi."

"Aishiteru, koibitu," Inuyasha replied, his blush back in full force as he glowed an incandescent purple.

* * *

**Part the Fifth**

Bankotsu grinned as his fourth— or maybe it was fifth?— aiji darted past him, trying to reach his older sister— or perhaps it was brother— who'd just stolen his treat. "Behave, Juri," he intoned.

" 'Tou-san," the child whined, "I'm Aiko."

Bankotsu waved a dismissive hando. "Whichever one you are, give Maya back her… what is that?"

Aiko grudgingly returned the mottled brown length of what appeared to be leather to the other child. "That's Sakura, 'Tou-san," he muttered sulkily.

"Yes, yes…" Bankotsu retrieved another child— his ninth?— from where it appeared to be attempting to scale the dorui. "What it is?"

"Toad-jerky," Aiko replied matter-of-factly. " 'Kaa-san found a toad molesting this girl, and killed him, but the girl got really upset and cried n' stuff." He pulled a chunk of the stuff from a pocket and began munching happily. "It was weird," he continued around his mouthful.

"Where is your mother, anyway?" Bankotsu wanted to know. "I haven't seen her in hours."

"Oh, she pupped this morning, didn't she mention it to you?" Sakura piped up, licking the last bits of salted toad from her tiny tesaki.

Bankotsu shook his heddo. "By this point, it hardly takes any time at all. There's no point in calling me in for it, it's over before it begins." He looked around for the rest of his offspring. "C'mon Maya, Seichi, Tsuki, Juri, Hana, Akina, Haru, Taku, Hiroshi, Kaiya, and Serenity! Let's go see the new baby!"

The children trooped into the ie ahead of him. The thin wail of a newborn akachan could be heard at the end of the houdou, and they all filed into the suki.

Bankotsu's aisai stood there, deftly maneuvering the mutsuki around the tiny hanyou's teiru. "What'll we name her, Bankotsu?" she asked, glancing over her shoulder at the assembly behind her before turning and holding the baby up for inspection.

He studied his newest child's bright red hea and meibou that were already showing signs of becoming green. "How about Seiyou?" he suggested. "Since you seem so fond of them."

Ayame plunked the baby into her oldest's arms with an admonishment to watch her, then threaded her arm through her husband's and led him out of the room and down the hall. "That's a brilliant idea, Bankotsu," she cooed into his ear. "Have I mentioned lately how sexy it is when you're clever?"

He grinned at her in a most suave manner. "I'm clever all the time, Ayame."

She pushed him onto the futon with a grin of her own, moving to cover him with her body. "Exactly."

And nine months later, Bankotsu was thinking of yet another name. He thought Ginkotsu, after his fallen friend, was a fine fassutoneemu for a ookami hanyou, even if she was a girl.

ainoto doorway  
aisai wife  
akachan infant  
ake scarlet  
aiji child  
amido door  
ani brother  
benkyouzukue desk  
chea chair  
chibi small, little  
choko sake cup  
chouriba kitchen  
chouridai table  
dantsuku husband  
denbu butt  
dorui wall  
faasutoneemu name  
furoaa floor  
futon bedgenko fist  
hando hand  
hea hair  
heddo head  
hoippu riding crop  
houdou hallway  
houshi monk  
ideyu hot spring  
ie house  
itami pain  
jaa jar  
katahada bare shoulder  
kawaii cute  
kisu kiss  
koishii, koibitu beloved, darling  
meibou eyes  
morohiza knees  
mutsuki diaper  
namida tear  
ookami wolf  
onsen hot spring  
raketto paddle  
seiyou leaf  
suki room  
takebouki bamboo broom  
teiru tail  
tesaki fingers 


End file.
